Chapter 41: Brazil

       In 2015 I had the opportunity to teach one of my preaching courses in Brazil. Bethany has been sponsoring the professor/missionary Lyndell Requia at the Rio Grande de Sol Seminary in Porto Alegre and she invited me to come out. The following are my journal entries that I sent back to my church of the things I learned and experienced along the way:

August 19, 2015

I used my three flights to Porto Alegre to finish three books, view a documentary on Mars and watch the movie TomorrowLand. Unfortunately my longest flight from Chicago to Sao Paulo had a guy with really bad BO in the seat in front of me. I kept catching whiffs of it and sometimes had to sit with my shirt over my nose. I made it to my destination with about two hours of sleep and so I crashed as soon as I got into my hotel room.

On Monday, our missionary Lyndell Requia took me around downtown Porto Alegre to see some of the different streets, shops and the largest Catholic Cathedral in the city. At one corner two guys had a laugh as they tried to hand me a piece of paper. When Lyndell translated she told me they were handing out coupons for haircuts at a loyal solon. I then got their joke and was able to laugh along with them. The atmosphere on the streets and the people remind me a lot of Europe and, like Africa, I enjoy the constant chatter, crowds, and open markets more than our cold environment on the streets back home.

On Wednesday I will be heading to Chain-of-Love where I will get to see my sponsor child Bruna as well as Jim Paris. Jim is a man I had the chance to lead to Christ at Greenfield (my previous church). Since that time he has gone on to seminary and now works fulltime for Chain-of-Love.

My classes are each week night from 7-10 and I’ve taught two so far. Almost all of the students work other jobs all day and so they have most of their classes in the evening The translation has not been as much of a hindrance as I was expecting, as my translators of been excellent and the class seems to flow well. I will also be preaching at one of the local Baptist churches on Sunday and doing a three hour morning workshop for pastors next Wednesday.

Pastor Stef's sponsor child Bruna, from Chain of Love

Saturday, Aug. 22

My first week of teaching was great. On Saturday I took a break and went with three of the missionaries to two different places where they make wine. These were two of the most famous wine making places in Brazil. One of them even had an experimental vineyard with different grapes from all over the world. The places were huge. Each wine vat was two stories tall and one of the places produces 2400 bottles an hour - 40% of the wine in Brazil. Both places gave us a tour, followed by a wine tasting. They taught us how to properly hold our glass, examine the wine, smell it, twirl it and then taste it. In total, we each got to taste five different wines and two different champions. Since I hardly drink wine I couldn’t really tell the difference. One of the wines we tasted was what they served both Pope Francis and Pope Benedict when they were both last in Brazil. We also went cheese and sausage tasting, which was great - better than the wine!


Sunday, Aug. 23

On Sunday I went to a BBQ lunch, complete with a cowboy (gaucho) show with dancing, swords and whips. Waiters come around and cut meat for you right off of a skewer. There were about fifteen different styles of beef, chicken, pork and chicken hearts (which I didn’t eat). The meat was very fresh, tasty and salty. Each afternoon we’ve been having a 5:30pm coffee. I’ve become a coffee drinker, which is something I will have to break when I get back to Canada.

The church services in Brazil are in the evenings.  I preached (with a translator) at a Baptist church at 7pm on “Jesus Calming the Storm” in Mark 4. The services are about two hours long – that’s one less hour than the Cameroonian services!

Sunday came to a shocking end when I got back to my hotel. A couple of days earlier I went to the front desk and asked where I could get my laundry done and was told that if I left it on the bed they would take care of it. So that’s what I did. When I went to pay my bill I discovered they charged me A HUNDRED DOLLARS for only one load of laundry, not even ironed. I told them that my clothes were not even worth that much. I still haven’t paid them and they said they would look into it. I was on the internet later than evening and noticed that one of my favorite bands, Stryper, is coming out with a new album in October, but I might not be able to afford it because I washed my clothes!


Monday, Aug. 24

I went to visit some of the slums today where many of the kids from Chain-of-Love come from, very dire conditions. I also got back to teaching my classes. Some of the students are quite conservative. When I talked about using different translations to study a passage one of them asked why. I discovered that there is a “perfect” Portuguese translation and all the others are bad – just like a few think about the King James in English. So much education still needs to be done!

I read my first “Father Brown” (by G.K. Chesterton) story before I went to bed tonight. They are detective stories about an Anglican Priest. This one was called “The Blue Cross”. I loved how the story concluded. A man was pretending to be a priest to try and trick Father Brown so that he could steal a cross. Early in the story Father Brown engages him in a conversation about the universe which seems to have little relevance at the time. Later, when the false priest is about to steal the cross, he discovers that Father Brown is one step ahead of him and has everything arranged so that he can’t pull off his crime. When the thief asks Father Brown how he knew what he was up to and how he knew he wasn’t really a priest, Father Brown responds by saying (and here is that great last line):

"A part of my trade made me sure you weren’t a priest.”

“What?” asked the thief, almost gasping.

“You attacked reason,” said Father Brown. “It’s bad theology.”


Tuesday, Aug. 25

I had an extremely stimulating lunch conversation today. It was with the founder of the Baptist Seminary I am teaching at. He has also been the pastor of Central Baptist church here in Porto Alegre for the past 25 years. He retired two years ago, around the time his wife died. He speaks English and is quite a theologian. He was part of the Brazilian liberation theology movement back in the 70’s and he was sponsored by the World Council of Churches to be part of their ecumenical conversations in Europe around the same time. He also received full scholarships to study theology at both Oxford and Bristol. He chose Bristol because it is where John Wesley was from. He also studied at Geneva, where John Calvin set up his school of theology. He also got to personally know the German theologian Jurgen Moltmann, having theological conversations with him till 3am. Moltmann invited him, on a full scholarship, to study under him at Tubingen in Germany. He never took up the offer because he ended up getting married and starting his position at Central Baptist. Throughout all of this he remained a solid (but broad minded) evangelical and a tremendous mentor and influencer to the Baptist pastors here. He did spend a little time lamenting what he sees as the anti-intellectualism (and even suspicion of theological study) that has recently been increasing in the Baptist churches. He said the “deepest” things many pastors are now reading go no further than the devotional writings of Swindoll and Lucado and that the laity aren’t reading at all. He attributes a lot of it to the emotionally music driven charismatic (and often prosperity gospel) churches (with sermons only loosely based on the Bible) rather than churches driven by strong biblical and theological preaching. He said he was glad I was out here teaching in this area as it is desperately needed in Brazil (as it is around the world).

I’ve got a number of hours of teaching ahead of me. I teach another class tonight from 7-10pm and then teach an advanced preaching class for the pastors in the area tomorrow morning from 9-12pm.

By the way, while talking with this pastor at lunch and eating my black bean stew, Lyndell told me that there were pig ears and pig tails in it. I kept eating and remembered Ron Hiller’s (an elder at Bethany who also served for some years in Cameroon) missionary motto: “Where he leads me, I will follow. What he feeds me, I will swallow.” And I did!


Discuss: Have you even lived or traveled to a Latin American country? What do you love about Latin American culture?

Chapter 40: Study

If you enter my office and study the paraphernalia within you will learn a lot about me. I have placed special reminders everywhere of who I love, what I stand for and who I am. I’ve spent thousands of hours in my office reading, studying, praying, sermonizing, writing, putting together classes, counselling, phoning, emailing, planning and sometimes just wondering what the heck I should be doing. Space is important to me. I look forward to getting into my space and doing my work where I have so often connected with God.   

In one of his books, Eugene Peterson laments the fact that churches now refer to the pastor’s office as an “office”. He wishes churches would return to the more traditional description of calling it the pastor’s “study”. Peterson sees the change in language to correspond with a lessening amount of time many pastors spend in study. They are busy running the church as a CEO in order to keep the people coming back to be entertained with religious services. But we have lost the role of the resident theologian/teaching pastor in many churches. Theologians are not always efficient! I agree with Peterson, and because I desire to be a theologian/teaching pastor, I will refer to my “office” as my “study” for the remainder of this chapter.  

So what does one see in my study? My desk faces a collage of pictures. None of them have been hung for aesthetic reasons. Each is there because of what they mean to me. There are pictures of my wife and kids. There are pictures of Christian thinkers who have influenced me like C.S. Lewis, John Newton, Francis Schaeffer, John Stott and Martin Luther. I have John Calvin and Jacob Arminius sharing the same picture frame!

Though I consider myself an Arminian, John Calvin is one of my favorite theologians and I have repeatedly found his Institutes to be uplifting and deeply devotional. A quote from the Institutes sits framed on one of my bookshelves, encapsulating for me the goal of thinking about God. Calvin writes: 

Doctrine is not an affair of the tongue, but of life; it is not apprehended by the intellect and memory merely, like other branches of learning; but it is received only when it possesses the whole soul and finds its seat and habitation in the inmost recesses of the heart. (Institutes, III, VI, 4).  

In my collage is an article by my doctoral teacher Haddon Robinson on the importance of reading for the life of the preacher. The books on my shelves are testimony to this love life of mine. And I’m thankful that each church I have served has blessed me with a book fund so that I don’t break my own bank account. I think it was Erasmas who said that if he had to choose between books and food he would choose books! Over the years, however, the number of physical books I own has been significantly reduced. Much of my library has been sent to stock a seminary in Cameroon and with e-books and online resources, many of the reference books I used to use are no longer necessary.    

On my wall is the famous picture of the resurrected Jesus teaching the two disciples on the way to Emmaus. This would be the best seminary education one could get! Then there is a picture of the moment “Christian,” from Pilgrim’s Progress, comes to the cross and the burden on his back falls off. I love that imagery and its depiction of the power of the cross. I have a picture of the “weeping prophet” Jeremiah, painted by Rembrandt. This was given to me by an older lady who struggled with depression at a time when I was struggling with it.

I love the paintings, color and style, of Van Gogh. One picture of his is called “The Church at Auvers” and it depicts a church with no doors. It hangs in my office asking questions. Are we a church with “no doors?” Do we only serving insiders? How do outsiders get in? Is a church with no doors really even a church?  

I have framed several scenes from Alice in Wonderland surrounding a quote from a letter Lewis Carroll included in that book. The story of Alice in Wonderland often frustrates people because it “has no point.” It is not “accomplishing” anything. Our frustration with this exposes our driven adulthood where we have reduced everything to measurements, results and “having a purpose.” Carroll wanted to depict children at play and the delight they take in the randomness and pointlessness of it. When I see these pictures of Alice in Wonderland I am reminded to take life less seriously. To have fun. To play. To become children, like Jesus called us to be. If I don’t do this I end up becoming a machine and less of a human being. The quote from Lewis Carroll’s letter reads:

I do not believe that God means for us to divide life into two halves…. Do you think he only comes to see kneeling figures and to hear only tones of prayers – and that he does not also love to see the lambs leaping in the sunlight, and to hear the merry voices of the children at play? Surely their innocent laughter is as sweet in his ears as the greatest anthem that ever came from some solemn cathedral.

In the center of all these pictures I have Raphael’s famous School of Athens. It depicts many of the greatest human thinkers in history with Plato and Aristotle in the middle. It is an illustration of humanity’s wisdom. Above that painting I have placed another painting. This one was done by Mattias Grunewald around the year 1515. It shows Jesus hanging on the cross with John the Baptist pointing the world to him. (This painting is not meant to be historically, but theologically accurate). I have purposely placed this picture above the Athens one with this verse from 1 Corinthians 1:25 between them: The foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom. In other words, Jesus’ death on the cross, God’s weakness, God’s “stupidity,” has accomplished more and is more profound than all human wisdom put together. I love Paul’s wording here! I look at this everyday as I write my sermons.    

Around my office you will see a picture from Cameroon of an African Jesus blessing the African people. My degrees are hung up. A cartoonist’s caricature of me hangs next to them. There is the “Contagious Character” award I received from the Greenfield Elementary school for the work I did there while a pastor at Greenfield. On top of one of my bookshelves is Stryper’s first record, “The Yellow and Black Attack.” Next to it is a big foam hand with “Go Oilers” on it. (This is Edmonton’s professional hockey team). I have a beer bottle from Germany given to me from someone in the church called “Luther’s Brew”. It has a picture of Martin Luther on it who always bragged about his wife making the best beer in Germany.  

Then there is my John Wesley wig on a head stand. I’ve used this when I’ve dressed up like John and delivered one of his sermons. I think how funny it is that 250 years ago this style of dress was considered dignified. I wonder what they will say about the suit and tie 250 years from now! All of this reminds me not to get tied up in the externals of dress and style and equate that with Christianity.

Against one wall rests the staff my pastoral mentor Ralph Korner gave me at my ordination. On top of the staff rest the stole given to me at my infant baptism. On my desk is a verse that sums up my “job description”:

Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers. (1 Timothy 4:16).

These are visible signs of my call into pastoral ministry.

I have an icon of Jesus leaning against some of my books as an indicator that I am part of a great tradition of Christians who were here long before I was and that the church is much broader than “Baptist”. Although I am proud to be a “Baptist” Christian I have a comic on my door of two kids walking to church with one of the kids saying to the other, “We’re Baptist’s. What abomination are you?” There is an absurdity around denominationalism all centred around the person who prayed that we would be one as the Triune God is one. (John 17:20-26).

Finally, I have a picture of death. The words we are afraid to use are revealing. Like when we talk about the “birds and the bees” instead of sex or, as is now common, we refer to a funeral as a “celebration of life."

In the Middle Ages scholars used to place a skull on their desk so that they wouldn’t forget their mortality. I thought it would be good to redeem this practice, but realized that a skull might not go over well, even if it were only a plastic one from Halloween. I’ve opted for a picture instead.

In many Medieval Churches you can see pictures of people from different stations of life. There are kings, serfs, merchants, servants and babies. Then, beside each of them stands a dancing skeleton known as “The Dance of Death”. This skeleton is a Grim Reaper type figure who collects the dead when a person’s time has come to an end. These pictures are to remind people that they are all equal when death calls. From the highest emperor to the lowest peasant everyone will face death. The question then is how we will face death?   

On one of those frescos I found a curate (pastor) standing next to The Dance of Death. As the little story under this picture tells, this pastor lived more for himself than for Christ. I hope that I won’t be like this curate when The Dance of Death comes to get me. On the day of the resurrection I want to hear, “Well done good and faithful servant.” This picture keeps me sober. I want to live in such a way that I won’t go down to the grave listening to The Dance of Death sing:      

Mad fool, old of years.

You have not chosen anything else than the goods of this world.

I know not, what shall become of you.

You paid to little heed to me,

And neither did you think of dying.

Now you must enter into the land,

Mr. Curate, give me your hand.

Question: What kinds of things do you put around your space to reflect your character and help make things feel “homey”?

Chapter 39: Prayer

Prayer has never been an area of strength for me. How does one pray? It’s funny to hear some evangelicals accuse those from liturgical churches of “rote” praying from prayer books. If you listen to the average evangelical pray for any length of time you will certainly hear a lot of “rote” repetition, and an inferior type. “Keep us safe as we travel. Be with Martha during her Chemo treatments. Bless my wife. Bless my children. And bless this food to our body’s use.” 

               One thing that helped me learn to pray was discovering that we have a prayer book in the Bible. Eugene Peterson was the one who pointed this out to me. In his introduction to the Psalms in the Message translation of the Bible, he writes:

               Most Christians for most of the Christian centuries have learned to pray by praying the Psalms…. Only as we develop raw honest and detailed thoroughness in our praying do we become whole, truly human in Jesus Christ, who also prayed the Psalms.

I’ve been using the Psalms in this way from some time now. In fact, shortly after I started at Bethany I decided to pray through all the Psalms by writing them out in my own words. To allow others to join me in this I started a prayer blog in which I post one Psalm a week that I’ve prayed in my own words. The blog states the purpose of what we are doing by saying, “This is meant to be for prayer and not theological debate. These reflective prayers on the Psalms are not a translation or paraphrase, but simply prayers that come out of mediating on the words of the Psalm.” People are encouraged to write their own prayers based on the Psalm and post them alongside of mine. I thought this would be a creative way for the community of Bethany to pray together. Unfortunately, few people have participated. I hope that people at least benefit from reading my prayers. Ultimately I’m not doing it for them, but to spend time with God, and so I continue on. As an example, here is my prayer from Psalm 96.  

How often do I read about creating new songs to praise you with?

And yet we get so comfortable with our old songs – which were new at one point!

You have made us creative people and you are a God who is always doing something new.

Help us not to get stuck with what you have done, but to be a part of what you are doing.

The whole earth is singing your praises.

Your salvation has gone global.

People are found by you every day.

May we tell the stories.

            Write them.

            Blog them.

            Tweet them.

            Paint them.

            Draw them. 

            Mold them.

You are great.

Worthy of praise.

Feared above all others.

Every god is a fake, invented by people’s wishful thinking.

You alone are the real God.

You are our creator.

May we conform to your image and not make you into ours.

You are beautiful and full of honor and majesty.

May those who don’t know you come to see your strength and power.

May they bow before you in worship and offer you their life.

Let the whole world praise you.

May every country fear the Lord.

May every nation know that the Lord reigns.

No matter what their leaders may say, the Lord reigns!

God will not allow injustice to destroy his creation.

He will hold it together, restore and renew it.

He will judge everyone fairly.

May everything in heaven sing.

May everything on earth praise.

May everything in the ocean exalt.

Let the fields and their crops dance and celebrate.

Let the trees pull up their roots and jump for joy.

The very stones will cry out in ecstasy.

All creatures of our God and King are in prayer. 

Creation eagerly awaits your second coming.

When you judge the earth with holiness, justice and truth the wicked and the righteous will get what they deserve. 

For several years I’ve dedicated the first hour and a half of each weekday to devotion (8:30am-10:00am). This time consists of Bible reading, writing prayers in a journal from a dollar store and reading a work of theology. I’ve noticed that I’m more disciplined, wrestle with fewer demons and hear from God a lot better when I’ve had a good night’s sleep, showing how intertwined our spiritual and physical health are. I crave these times and usually wake up anticipating them. What a privilege to have a hot cup of tea, my Bible, a journal, a heady book of theology and an hour and-a-half to just be with God each morning. I don’t know if I could pastor a church without these times. In fact, I would find it difficult to stay grounded in life. I recognize that this is a privilege and something many people in many places in the world don’t have the luxury of engaging in. It is certainly something I’m grateful for, and a spiritual discipline I hope to maintain until the day I die. 

Question: What are some of ways you have found it helpful to pray?

Chapter 38: Books

   I love reading. Everywhere I go I have books with me. They are in my office. They are in my car. They are on the coffee table. They are by my bed. I carry them in my hands, backpack, coat pockets and even my socks if they are small enough. I’m usually reading about forty or fifty books at a time. Novels, history, theology, biography, sociology and on it goes. I find most everything interesting and love seeing how different fields of study intersect.

   In the midst of this pile of authors there are a few who stand out in their impact on my life. Historically, the reformers Martin Luther and John Calvin have done that for me. In the contemporary world I think of Eugene Peterson and Roger Olson. One group I seem to identify with best are those British evangelical Anglicans; John Stott, Alister McGrath, N.T. Wright, John Newton and C.S. Lewis, to name a few.

   I encourage every Christian to find mentors in books, both among the living and the dead. Don’t just dabble with their material. Immerse yourself in them so that you can see, feel and think as they do. This saves you from getting stuck within the narrowness of your own thoughts. You’ll also need to expand the perspectives of your mentors. Recently I have been reading more from Africans, Asians and women, as I recognize a lack of their influence in my thinking. This doesn’t mean you’ll agree with everything your mentors will say. There are a number of things I disagree with John Calvin on, and yet he has deeply impacted me. 

   There is so much that can be said in this chapter about different writers who have influenced me that I will limit myself to four: Francis Schaeffer, C.S. Lewis, John Newton and Charles Spurgeon. 

Francis Schaeffer 

   The fall of 1996 was my first year as a seminary student. For the last couple of years I had been struggling with my faith. It was then that I came across a little book entitled Pollution and the Death of Man (1970), by Francis Schaeffer. I had a theology assignment on creation due and the book title made me think it might help.  So I started reading, not realizing the profound effect this book was going to have on my understanding of Jesus and his message. After reading it my obsessive compulsiveness took over and I spent the next two years reading through the works of Francis Schaeffer. 

   Schaffer taught me the importance of preaching the physical message of the gospel.

   I’d grown up in a Christian home. I’d gone through four years of Bible College. I’d been a youth pastor for two years. But it wasn’t until I was 22 that I started to “get” the holistic message of Jesus, and I’ve been learning and preaching it ever since. 

   As a brief synopsis, the following words from Pollution and the Death of Man ended up establishing the foundation of how I see life and my purpose in the world.

   While we should not romanticize the tree, we must realize that God made it and it deserves respect because he made it a tree…. The Christian has reason for dealing with each created thing with a high level of respect…. We certainly cannot think the material low when we realize that God created it…. To think of them as low is really to insult the God who made them….
   (Also) the resurrection and ascension prove there is no reason to make a false dichotomy between the spiritual and the material. That is a totally non-biblical concept…. Christ’s body really was raised from the dead. It could be touched, and he could eat…. This body was not just an apparition or a ghost….
   The fact that our bodies are going to be raised also speaks of this…. Why should I say my body is lower than my soul when God made both my body and soul?

   The implications in understanding this are huge. 

   As Paul wrote to Timothy, “Since everything God created is good, we should not reject any of it but receive it with thanks. For we know it is made acceptable by the word of God and prayer. If you explain these things to the brothers and sisters, Timothy, you will be a worthy servant of Christ Jesus, one who is nourished by the message of faith and the good teaching you have followed.“ (1 Timothy 4:4-6, NLT). 

   I went from being a spiritual (gnostic) Christian, only concerned about saving “souls” to no longer believing in “souls” (in the Platonic sense of having a ghostly part living in our body). I came to understand that Christianity is a physical faith. In fact, it is the one faith that truly upholds God’s creation and humanity to their rightful and dignified place. From this, Schaeffer went on to teach me an appreciation for art and science and the place of the social gospel. Biblical (gospel) preaching intersects all of these areas. Schaeffer informed my preaching and prayer life to understand the words in the Lord’s Prayer that say, “May it be on earth as it is in heaven.”  

   Christianity doesn’t allow you to escape real life. Instead it is about blood, dirt, ashes, semen, menstrual-cycles, gravel and saliva. It’s why the church practices rituals that involve water, wine and bread. Jesus gave us things that we can taste, see, smell, feel and hear to remember him by. A Christianity that is only spiritual, and not engaged with physical life, is not true Christianity.

C.S. Lewis

   Lewis is by far the most delightful author I have ever read. I have read most of his Christian stuff more than once and I am now beginning to read though his books on English literature. C.S. Lewis has taught me the importance of using one’s imagination and to think with pictures and stories. I can pull any one of Lewis’ books off my shelf, open it at random, and find ideas expressed so well that you cannot help quoting them out of sheer delight at his images, wit and ability with words. Just listen as he challenges us to live in light of the resurrection: 

   Who will trust me with a spiritual body if I cannot even control an earthly body? These small and perishable bodies we now have were given to us as ponies are given to schoolboys. We must learn to manage: not that we may someday be free of horses altogether but that someday we may ride bare-back, confident and rejoicing, those greater mounts, those winged, shining and world-shaking horses which perhaps even now expect us with impatience, pawing and snorting in the Kings stables. (Miracles).

   What is it about this beer drinking, chain smoking, Anglican teacher who believed in purgatory and evolution, that has made him so popular among evangelicals? Lewis could write works of philosophy like the Abolition of Man, apologetics like Mere Christianity and Miracles, while at the same time write some of the greatest children’s literature of the 20th century in the Tales of Narnia. In the same way the Bible has the logic of Proverbs, the stories of Genesis, the poetry of the Psalms, the hyperboles of Jesus, the metaphors of Paul and the visions, dreams and creatures of fantasy of Revelation. Without an imagination you are going to have a difficult time interpreting large chunks of scripture. Lewis even tells us to stop feeding on only milk and grow-up and become children! As he writes in his dedication in The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe to Lucy Barfield: 

   I wrote this story for you, but when I began it I had not realized that girls grow quicker than books. As a result you are already too old for fairly-tales, and by the time it is printed and bound you will be older still. But some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again. You can then take it down from some upper shelf, dust it, and tell me what you think of it. I shall probably be too deaf to hear, and too old to understand a word you say, but I will still be your affectionate godfather, C.S. Lewis. 

   In other words, Lewis taught me how to read and, in turn, taught me how to read the Bible. Lewis was a man who allowed God to use his imagination, his questions, and even his scepticism to become one of the greatest influencers of Christianity in the 20th century. God is making all things new and I cannot think of a better individual to read who, in describing this, sends shivers down my spine by engaging my mind, emotions and whole being. I want these last words from The Last Battle to be read at my funeral: 

   “There was a real railway accident,” said Aslan softly. “Your father and mother and all of you are – as you used to call it in the Shadowlands – dead. The term is over: the holidays have begun. The dream is ended: this is the morning.”
   And as he spoke he no longer looked to them like a lion; but the things that began to happen after that were so great and beautiful that I cannot write them. And for us this is the end of all stories, and we can most truly say that they all lived happily ever after. But for them it was only the beginning of the real story. All their life in Narnia had only been the cover and the title page: now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story which no one on earth has read: which goes on forever: in which every chapter is better than the one before. 

John Newton

   Early in my ministry at Greenfield I bought a little book at a second-hand bookstore for $2 called Letters of John Newton. This book sat on my shelf for about seven years when, looking for somebody to accompany my devotions, I picked it off my shelf and began reading it.  

   I felt like these letters were written to me. How did Newton know to send these letters to me at precisely the time I was discouraged in my pastoral work and needed the encouragement of another pastor? After reading this book I was ecstatic to find out that he had written over 500 other letters, and so I ordered them and have since read all his letters, books, sermons and hymns that are available.  

   Many know John Newton through the hymn "Amazing Grace." Fewer know John’s story of a once arrogant, licentious, African slave trader who turned himself over to Christ. Fewer still know of the impact this slave-trader, turned Christian, turned pastor, had through his letter writing. Many of Newton’s letters were written to pastors and he became something of a pastor to pastors in his lifetime. And that is what he became to me. He has become to me what Paul was to Timothy. 

John Newton taught me that preaching comes out of the everyday life of being a pastor. One of Newton’s great themes to pastors was the development of their character. 

   Ministers cannot be too earnest in the discharge of their office; it behoves them to use all diligence to find out acceptable words, and to proclaim the whole counsel of God. Yet when they have done all, they have done nothing, unless their word is accompanied to the heart by the power and demonstration of the Spirit.

   Newton’s words to this hot blooded Italian pastor need to be continually remembered and reread when facing opposition. 

   Don’t embitter your spirit against those who oppose you and speak back in anger and set them at defiance. Don’t retaliate upon them in their own way. By doing this you only bring guilt upon your conscience, increase your difficulties, and impede your usefulness. Be patient in well-doing. A consistency in character, and an attention to return kindness for hard treatment, will, in a course of time, greatly soften the spirit of opposition.

   Newton counsels me about my fans as well. Writing to one minister he says:

   With these advantages, I expect to see you a popular preacher. The more you are so, the greater will be your field of usefulness, but, alas! You cannot yet know to what it will expose you. It is like walking on ice. If opposition has hurt many, popularity has wounded more. 

   Newton spoke to pastors of the value of their temptations: 

   Though the Lord does not desire to hurt you, he has permitted Satan to sift, tempt, and shoot his fiery arrows at you. Without some of this discipline, you would have been very unfit for that part of your office which consists in speaking a word in season to weary and heavy-laden souls.

   And Newton’s continual reminder to pastors:

   We cannot hope to be useful to our people, unless we give them reason to believe that we love them, and have their interest at heart.

   Newton’s pastoral letters are filled with advice on preaching, visitation, study, evangelism, discipline and the list goes on. His letters are a seminary to the pastor who takes the time to read them. They are written by one who was in the trenches of ministry. 

   There is also something that caused Newton to be misunderstood by many. He remained in the Church of England, yet had a difficult time obtaining ordination from them because many found his beliefs to be too evangelical. Yet, when his non-conformist friends offered him positions in independent churches they were confused by his desire to remain an Anglican. He made the conservative establishment and Calvinist non-conformists uncomfortable because he supported the open air revival preaching of John Wesley. At the same time he did not accept Wesley’s Arminianism and remained a Calvinist. Living in a day where much of the church was bitterly divided into numerous parties, Newton was a voice of reason. He brought pastors and leaders together from across denominations as part of his Eclectic Society, where they would, in a spirit of love, discuss current issues and pray for one another. 

   I will quote Newton at length with themes I’ve always desired to champion. 

   Whether a minister wears a black gown or a stole, whether he be ordained by the laying on or the holding up of hands; whether water-baptism should be administered by a spoon-full, tub-full, or in a river, are to me points of no great importance. I will go further – though a man does not agree with my views of election, yet if he gives me good evidence that he is called of God, he is my brother.
If he loves Jesus, I will love him, whatever name he may be called by, and whatever incidental mistakes I may think he holds. His differing from me will not always prove him to be wrong, unless I am infallible myself.
   I preach my own sentiments plainly, but peaceably, and directly oppose no one. Accordingly, Churchmen and Dissenters, Calvinists and Arminians, Methodists and Moravians, now and then I believe, Catholics and Quakers, sit quietly to hear me.

   Newton understood that virtues like tolerance, acceptance and diversity can be good qualities in the church and he often stood his ground preaching this. It was anything but a watered down faith that caused Newton to take this stand. Instead, it was his commitment to Christ.

   Moderation is a Christian grace; it differs much from that tame, unfeeling neutrality between truth and error, which is so prevalent in the present day.

   Newton’s pastoral character, wisdom, and teaching are what I want to grow up to emulate in my preaching and pastoral ministry. For me he has become the model pastor. He was committed to Christ, committed to preaching the gospel, committed to the unity of the church and committed to people as individuals. He was committed to any pastor, of any denomination, who had a love for Christ.

Charles Spurgeon

   Little do we realize how much we owe Spurgeon for the development of today’s preaching. Spurgeon has been named the “prince of preachers” and so it would seem that we should want to find out a bit about him if we are preachers ourselves.

   Charles Spurgeon taught me the importance of relevance in preaching. I try to find common ground with everyone, doing everything I can to save some (1 Cor. 9:22), could be a theme verse for him. Spurgeon believed that if people couldn’t understand the preacher it was the preacher’s fault. As you’ll read, like Lewis, Spurgeon too was a master of word pictures.

   An average hearer who is unable to follow the course of thought of the preacher ought not to worry himself, but to blame the preacher, whose business it is to make the matter plain. If you look down a well, if it be empty it will appear to be very deep, but if there be water in it you will see brightness. I believe that many “deep” preachers are simply so because they are like dry wells with nothing whatever in them, except decaying leaves, a few stones, and perhaps a dead cat or two. If there be living water in your preaching it may be very deep, but the light of truth will give clearness to it. It is not enough to be so plain that you can be understood; you must speak so they you cannot be misunderstood. 

   Spurgeon made room for humor in his preaching.

   I’m not sure if smiling is a sin, and, at any rate, I think it less a crime to cause momentary laughter than half-an-hour of profound slumber. Nothing will avail if you go to sleep yourself while preaching. 

   Charles Spurgeon understood the importance of reading for a life of preaching. 

   As the apostle says to Timothy, so also he says to everyone, “Give yourself to reading.” He who will not use the thoughts of other men’s brains proves that he has no brains of his own. You need to read. Spare neither labour in the study, prayer in the closet, nor zeal in the pulpit. 

   On the other hand, Spurgeon understood the limits of study. 

   If we degenerate into bookworms it will be to the old serpent’s delight, and to our own misery.
You cannot gain certain knowledge from books; you must have personal acquaintance with men if you are to help them in their varied spiritual experience.

   Charles Spurgeon understood the importance of passion in preaching. 

   If you preach the truth in a dull, monotonous style, God may bless it, but in all probability he will not; at any rate the tendency of such a style is not to promote attention, but to hinder it. It is not often that sinners are awakened by ministers who are themselves asleep.
   A great deal of sermonizing may be defined as saying nothing at extreme length; but out-of-door, verbosity is not admired: you must say something more, or your hearers will let you know. In the street, a man must keep himself alive, and use many illustrations and anecdotes, and sprinkle a quaint remark here and there. 

   Charles Spurgeon understood the importance of personal pain and about being open about it in preaching. Throughout his ministry Spurgeon struggled with depression and gout and talked about it in his sermons and writing. At times he was even out of his pulpit for up to six months because of his illnesses. One of his talks in Lectures to my Students is entitled “The Minister’s Fainting Fits”. It is not a chapter on stage fright, but on depression in the preaching ministry. This chapter has been a lifesaver to me through some of my struggles. It has been a piece I’ve gone over many times. In fact, his self-study (done in the 1870s) is a brilliant piece of work and right up to date regarding many of the causes and cures of depression that have been discovered through modern psychology. Spurgeon believed that God uses pain as part of the process of developing the preacher and the preacher’s message. That insight alone can revolutionize how we embrace the pain and suffering we go through. 

   Is not this the reason why God’s servants are made to pass through so many trials, that they may really learn many truths not otherwise apprehended? Do we learn much in sunny weather? Do we not profit most in story times? Have you not found it so – that your sick bed – your bereavement – your depression of spirit, has instructed you in many matters which tranquillity and delight have never whispered to you?
   I often feel very grateful to God that I have undergone fearful depression of spirits. I know the borders of despair, and the horrible brink of that gulf of darkness into which my feet have almost gone; but hundreds of times I have been able to give a helpful grip to my brothers and sisters who have come into that same condition, which I could never have given if I had not known their deep despondency. I believe that the darkest and most dreadful experience of a child of God will help him to be a fisher of men if he will follow Christ. 

   Early on in my ministry at Bethany I was going through a particularly difficult time. I was even questioning whether or not I had the strength to carry on. One particular morning I left under a dark cloud while my wife was doing her devotions. Later that day she sent me this email. Once again, the Lord encouraged me through Spurgeon (through my wife).

Stef,  

   I love you. I believe in you. I am proud of you. I do not doubt for a minute that you are called to be here, at this time, at this church. I just read some encouraging words from Charles Spurgeon:

The lesson of wisdom is, be not dismayed by soul-trouble. Should the power of depression be more than ordinary, think not that all is over with your usefulness. Cast not away your confidence. Live by the day, by the hour. Come fair or foul, the pulpit is out watchtower, and the ministry our warfare; be it ours, when we cannot see the face of God, to trust under the shadow of his wings.

Nancy

   Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. (Hebrews 12:1, NLT).

   I not only read a lot, but I write a lot. If I were to add up all the sermons, papers, articles and books I’ve written, the pages would be in the thousands. I want to conclude this chapter by mentioning four self-published books I’ve completed through Guardian Press. 

   My first three are somewhat of a series based on the catechism you find in many mainline churches. The catechism is an introduction to the Christian faith and usually includes sections on the Apostle’s Creed, Ten Commandments, Lord’s Prayer and Baptism and Communion. I wrote these books from sermons I preached covering these same areas to try and better educate people in their faith. The books are meant as an introduction to thinking and living as a follower of Jesus. My book on the Apostle’s Creed is called, All Roads Lead Somewhere. My book on the Ten Commandments is called, This is Love. And my book on the Lord’s Prayer (which is my favorite title of the three) is called, Walking on your Knees. 

   I self-published one other book after completing my doctoral work on “Preaching and Depression”. Taking the material there and rewriting it for a broader audience, I put it out as a book called, Do You Have a Black Dog: A Biblical Perspective on Depression. Both Greenfield and Bethany have been a great support in my writing and publishing endeavors by giving me the time to write as well as the funds for these projects (which I pay back as the books sell).  I find writing an imperative tool to help me sort out my thinking, which I can then present as a tool to others. 

Discuss: What is your favourite book and why?

Chapter 37: Bethany

I was ready for a new adventure. I’d been at Greenfield for eleven years. My kids were beginning school and I felt I should make a decision as to whether I should stay at Greenfield for another dozen years or if it was time for a change. If possible, I wanted to avoid making a move once my kids got settled into a school and so the decision was becoming imminent.

Things were great at Greenfield. My wife and I had plenty of friends. People were becoming followers of Jesus. Our church had a surplus of money every year to the extent that we started giving money away to other ministries in need. We successful survived a building expansion and were running two services with an attendance of around 350. I was heavily involved in the elementary school across the street from the church and had just won a “contagious character” award from them. I was teaching at our local seminary and leading mission teams to Cameroon. Why, in the midst of all this, did I feel like I was in need of a change? That was a question Nancy asked a lot. Why couldn’t I be content and “bloom where I was planted”?  

It takes my wife a lot longer to process change than me and so I started sharing my thoughts with her about a year before any change took place. I knew this would be important for her. I also talked things through with trusted friends and mentors as well as my church staff and leadership board. It was important for me to hear from them to see if my thinking found any confirmation with others. Although no one wanted to see me go, the consistent affirmation and blessing I received helped me embrace my decision to make a move.

I was open to going anywhere in North America, but preferred to stay in Canada. So I started looking and praying for a church with problems. It’s funny, the kind of church I hear many pastors wanting to go to are churches that are so perfect that their arrival would only mess things up! I enjoy the challenge of going into established churches that have gotten off track and trying to help bring them back to God’s mission. Greenfield was like this at the beginning and the church I ended up going to was like Greenfield at the beginning, only on steroids.

When I started to hear about Bethany Baptist I was given several warnings not to go to this church. They had a reputation of being hard on their pastors and they were still fighting the “worship wars” that most churches had finished battling a decade ago. Without making a judgement as to who was right, a quick synopsis of Bethany’s history before I arrived goes something like this: 

After 60 years of being in Vancouver, Bethany sold off its property and built a large and beautiful building in Richmond. Shortly after their new building went up their senior pastor left. A new pastor was brought in who tried to modernize things and all hell broke loose. He was gone three years later. A blunt transition pastor then served the church for two years. “Either change or die” was his message. During this transition many congregants left and, ironically, went to more modern churches than Bethany. This dropped the annual giving by around $300,000. It was during this transition that Bethany crafted a new vision for herself to attempt to live out her desire to “reach out cross-culturally, winning, equipping, and empowering people for ministry.” Out of this I was hired to help rebuild the church.

The weekend I candidated was confirmation for me and the church. I was clear about where I stood and I had a pretty good idea of where the church was at. I let them know that if they called me I would come. The church voted 200 to 1 to call me as the senior pastor and I’m told everyone broke out into song.

The next day Nancy and I bought a house in Delta and when we put up our house in Edmonton it sold in a day. Things were moving very fast. This was unsettling for Nancy. Perfect for me!

Several people interpreted the quick finding of a house and sale of our other house as “proof” that we were in God’s will. I’m leery about making claims and reading into events like this. I see “being in God’s will” to be more about attitude, character and faithfulness than about things like location. Plus, I know friends who are going to be missionaries in Indonesia who are struggling to get a work visa there. Should they give up and interpret this as being “out of God’s will”? It is poor theology that thinks that if everything goes well it is from God and every time there is a struggle it is not from God. That would have put the apostle Paul out of God’s will a lot. Many times “open doors” are temptations for selfishness and “closed doors” are opportunities for Christians to do some kicking and lock picking. So I just thanked God for our smooth transition and avoided trying to read my “Christian” horoscope through how easy or difficult the door hinges moved.  

I began a new ministry at Bethany on Aug. 1, 2011. I preached my first sermon as their senior pastor on Aug. 7 on the Lost Sheep in Luke 15. My first months at Bethany were filled with annoying politicking. Everyone felt they had to tell me the “true” story of what “really” happened before I arrived. I had people warning me about who I shouldn’t trust and who I should hire and fire. In the same afternoon I’d have someone take me out for coffee and warn me, only to later in the day have another person warn me about the person I just had coffee with. Once a guy told me all the things he thought needed changing at the church, but when I got back to my office I found a message on my answering machine from his wife telling me that she disagreed with everything her husband told me. There was also a leftover $4500 platform extension project that the previous pastor had initiated. This really was a needed change as the way the stage was designed put the pulpit a long way off from the first pew. People however, made this into a spiritual issue and became so divided over it that some even stopped tithing when things didn’t go their way.

Conventional wisdom when starting at a new church is to change nothing for a year and just get to know the lay of the land. That was not possible at Bethany. We couldn’t afford a year of coasting. Things were going downhill and the politicking forced me to take a stand. So I decided to take a stand by refusing to take sides on the past. I wanted to allow everyone to have a fresh start. I would decide on my own who I could trust. We moved ahead with the stage extension and demons didn’t come out of the floor. We modernized the foyer and other sections of the church. The Sunday evening service and the German service were wrapped up and the German pastor retired. We also went through eleven staff changes and restructured our staff and deacon board. Besides preaching, I began teaching adult Sunday school as well as Friday night classes on theology, Bible reading, world religions and the New Testament. One of my big highlights since starting at Bethany was the team I took to Cameroon in 2014.

Despite the struggles at the beginning, things have been settling down. In 2013/14 we saw several people become Christians, paid off our building and watched our annual giving increase by over $110,000. Nancy and I have connected with a lot of people and enjoy Bethan y immensely. I’ve never second guessed coming here, which doesn’t serve a purpose anyway. I love the staff I work with and consider them all friends. I have a great respect for the elders even when they don’t agree with me and I get out voted. We’ve been able to work through many things and even disagree with each other respectfully and without arguing.  

One thing I wasn’t expecting when I started at Bethany was for my panic attacks to hit me again. The first one happened in the middle of a sermon. My body started tingling and I thought I was going to be paralyzed. Then they started happening all the time. Even in the checkout line at Walmart. I got so freaked out I thought I was going to have to quit. How could I do this to Bethany after everything they’d gone through? Now they get a new pastor and he has to resign after three months.

I then had my satanic night, probably the scariest night of my life so far. As I was lying in bed I thought I was going crazy. My body wanted to tear the room apart and hurt someone. I was doing everything I could to mentally fight these impulses. My mind started having dark thoughts and I felt like all the happiness was being sucked out of me from the Dementors in Harry Potter. I was about to check myself into the hospital when Nancy leaned over and laid her hands on me and started to pray. That calmed me down, but I knew something had to be done to fight these demons. My approach has always been to hit them with everything and so I got a doctor, got back on my medication, got connected with a good counselor, told my elders about the situation and got people to pray. I also found my reading of Martin Luther and his battles with the devil to be of great help.   

To help my doctor and counsellor my psychiatrist from Edmonton sent along the following letter, which gives a good summary of my medical history:

Thank-you for seeing Stefano Piva. Stefano is a 37 year old married man who recently moved to Vancouver as a senior pastor of a Protestant church. He is a very pleasant, articulate and well-educated man with a Doctorate of Ministry.

I started treating Pastor Stefano in June of 2007 for Panic Disorder and an episode of Major Depression. At that time, he suffered a likely viral flu with vomiting and had a likely flu induced “dizzy spell” while preaching. Unfortunately, this has subsequently conditioned into a full blown Panic Disorder – with pre-existing vulnerability that includes background perfectionism and mild obsessive worry. The Panic Disorder became very debilitating and stressful for pastor Stefano, particularly during sermons and with frequent spontaneous panic attacks. Consequently, Pastor Stefano also developed a major depression episode complicated with severe insomnia and activation of obsessive generalized worry. A sleep study later confirmed that pastor Stefano suffers as well from restless leg syndrome.

Fortunately, Pastor Stefano responded well at that time to treatment which initially included venlafaxine 150 mg po qam, clonazepam 0.5 qd prn, and zopiclone 7.5 mg qd prn. In addition, he is very psychologically minded and was able to participate in cognitive-behaviour therapy techniques and deep breathing relaxation to help with panic symptoms. His mood became euthymic and he has not suffered a depressive episode since 2007. He has the occasional re-emergence of panic symptoms, and one might expect his transition to a new vocation may be stressful.

As this time, pastor Stefano continues to do very well and his current medications are now only: Clonazepam 0.25 mg po qd, which he uses approximately two times a week, before events such as Sunday preaching. I would provide a prescription of Clonazepam 0.25 mg po qd with 30 tablets, with a refill in 60 days – this would last a long time.

He has no known allergies.

Past Medical history has included some gastric esophageal reflux. He has had surgeries for a hernia, wisdom teeth and nasal surgery. There is no history of metabolic syndrome. He is a non-smoker and does not drink caffeinated beverages regularly. There is no history of substance or alcohol dependence. There is no history of hospital admissions.

Thank-you for taking the time to care for a very pleasant man. Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions.

Kind regards, Daniel Li, BMedSc, MD, MSc, FRCPC 

When I started looking for a psychologist in the lower mainland I found out that Mark Davies, who taught some of my counselling courses when I was in seminary, had a practice in Surrey. Mark’s been a good counsellor for me. He is not the passive type who sits back and listens. He has no problem calling me a narcissist and not being overly impressed with me, as so many others are. He’s there to help me and a lot of this has to do with stripping me of my ego. He’s taken me through workbooks on anxiety and given me homework assignments to induce the feelings of a panic attack to then practice riding them through. The goal is not fighting panic, which only causes more of it, but learning to cope in the midst of it.

I’m currently on a daily dose of venlafaxine (75 mg) and I take 0.25 mg of clonazepam whenever needed (about once a week). I’ve tried to come off the venlafaxine on four different occasions and every time I do I crash within a couple of months. Because of all these crashes my wife has asked me to stay on it for five years before I try coming off it again.   

  

After so many years of preaching it is humbling to have this “thorn in the flesh”, but it’s comforting to know that God is the one who jabbed the thorn in. Understanding that it is from God and that he has a purpose for it makes it much more endurable. 

Question: What are one or two things you love about Bethany Baptist Church?

Chapter 36: Tattoos

“Do not cut your bodies for the dead, and do not mark your skin with tattoos. I am the Lord.” (Lev. 19:28, NLT).

I have three tattoos and there have been plenty of times the above Bible verse has been quoted at me. Usually the people don’t know where the verse is and so I help them find it. Once I show them I get a “you see,” as if I was unaware of the verse I just looked up for them. I usually point out that the verse right before it says, “Do not trim off the hair on your temples or trim your beards.” (Lev. 19:27, NLT). And that earlier in the same chapter we read, “Do not plant your field with two different kinds of seed. Do not wear clothing woven from two different kinds of thread.” (Lev. 19:19, NLT). None of these people obey those laws, so why single out the tattoo one for me?  

If I seem a little defensive you’re probably correct. One thing that really bugs me is legalism and the double standard that goes with it. And when I look at Jesus’ ministry I find myself in good company. Why do we reduce the life-giving message of the gospel to an encyclopedic reference manual for what we can and cannot do? Few people seem to know how to read the Bible properly. How is it that regular church attenders can listen to thousands of sermons and go to thousands of home Bible studies and still stumble over basic Bible stories and feel like they can’t explain the gospel to a non-Christian? I’m amazed at how many people have been Christians for decades who haven’t even read the whole Bible. And yet, it is these people who will tell me that “the Bible says” I shouldn’t have a tattoo. Talk about straining the gnat while swallowing the camel. (That’s in the Bible. Jesus said it!) If these individuals would stop shaving, trimming the hair on their temples, planting fields with two seeds and wearing clothing made by too different threads, I still wouldn’t listen to them (because I do not believe we are bound by these laws), but at least they would be consistent.

This book is not meant to be an explanation on how to read the Bible. There are many good books on that topic. One of the best is Gordon Fee and Douglas Stuart’s How to Read the Bible for all its Worth. Every Christian who wants to improve their Bible reading should read that book.

I got my first tattoo when I was 19. It’s on my right shoulder and is of the Tiny Toon character Plucky Duck. It was at this point that I began to wrestle with my faith. I started to question and change my mind on a number of beliefs that didn’t seem to be supported by scripture. Are we truly eternally secure? Is there really going to be a rapture of the church? Do we honestly possess an immortal soul? Must the days in Genesis be a literal 24 hour period? Are Israel and the church really two different people with two different covenants? Is becoming a Christian as easy as praying a prayer and asking for forgiveness? (In chapter 30 you read about the development of my belief in hell).  

The choice to get my first tattoo was an expression of becoming my own person. It was a rejection of some of the rigidity of the Plymouth Brethren Church I attended in my youth. This reformation in my thinking is something I think every person (and especially every Christian) should experience more than once in their life. The church reformers had a way of expressing a healthy church as “reformed and always reforming.” I expect my children to grow up and have some different views from me on God and the Bible. I’m not threatened by that. I’m more afraid of them falling into the dead legalism of church conformity than of them having a dynamic and risky faith that is expressed differently than my own. 

Why Plucky Duck? I watched the 1992 Tiny Toon’s movie How I Spent my Summer Vacation and loved Plucky’s energy, enthusiasm and, of course, his pluck. I also saw in him some of my arrogance, manipulation and talkativeness. I could relate. I still think he’s a cool character and have never regretted having him permanently put him on my body. J        

  

I got my second tattoo 18 years later as I wrapped up my ministry at Greenfield. This one is a symbol of the number one person in my life. The tattoo is of the four Greek letters Chi, Rho, Alpha and Omega. As Plucky as I am, with all the faults that accompany this, it is in Christ that I have found life. He saved a Plucky like me. Not to water me down, mummify the pluck out of me and place me in a sanitized church that’s “safe and fun for the whole family,” but to live for him in the world.   

 

The Greek letter for the “C” in Christ is Chi and is written “X”. The “hr” in Christ is Rho in Greek and is written “P”. The Chi Rho is the “P” superimposed over the “X” and has been used for centuries as a symbol for Christ. The Alpha and Omega are the first and last letters in the Greek alphabet and, in the book of Revelation, refer to Christ as the everlasting one. So, on the back of my left shoulder, I’ve chosen to display my commitment to Jesus Christ, the everlasting one.     

 I got my third tattoo on the day of my 40^th birthday. (I plan to get my 4^th one on my 50^th). This one is another expression of my faith. It’s on my right calf and is of a cross with the symbol of the Trinity intertwined around it. The symbol of the Trinity is red to represent the blood of Christ. You might think that it would have been more appropriate to have done the cross in red and the Trinity in black. I do realize that it was Jesus who died on the cross and not the other members of the Trinity, but I also believe that the whole Trinity suffered during this time. I believe that, in some way, there was a real break in the Godhead when Jesus said, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” In that sense there was a kind of death in the Trinity at that moment. Some will find this controversial and prefer to see God as an Unmoved Mover who is beyond all feelings of pain and suffering; thinking that suffering makes God less than a perfect. But I find this idea to be more philosophical than biblical. In any regard, I certainly uphold the orthodox view of the Trinity as one God in three persons. What actually happened in the Godhead at Christ’s death will remain a mystery. I believe that Jesus shed his blood for my sins and that this was motivated by the love of all persons in the Trinity. Though it was Jesus who shed his blood, it was God in his totality who suffered on my behalf. The cross and the red Trinity symbol on my right calf reminds me that the “weakness of God is stronger than human strength.” God’s victory came through his suffering. He is not a distant God, but a God who intimately knows and loves us.       

Discuss: Describe a tattoos you have and why you got it. Or describe a tattoo you would like to get and why.

Chapter 35: Cameroon

During a missions course I took in Bible School I started to think about becoming a missionary. I felt guilty with how much I had here in Canada compared with people in other parts of the world. There were some strikes against me, though. First, I’m horrible with languages. After finishing grade ten French with 21% I never took another language course, other than a very elementary “Biblical Language” course in seminary that I managed to scrape through. I also like traveling in my mind much more than on foot. My favorite part of a vacation is coming home and sleeping in my own bed. I’m a hobbit by nature. Let it rain outside while I hole up inside with a good book, warm fire and cup of tea, and I’m pretty much in heaven.    

               God has continued to convict me about the needs around the world. We all have a part to play in helping out, especially those of us who have plenty. My gifts are in the area of preaching and teaching and I realize that I’ve had numerous resources and opportunities to be well educated. I’ve spent 27 of my 40 years of existence in school!

I remember reading a commentary on Romans by John Stott where he was dealing with the spiritual gifts in chapter twelve. Stott went on to say that, with the vast explosion of Christianity in the past number of decades (mostly south of the equator) the greatest gift the church is in need of today is teachers. So many church leaders around the world have no education or resources for their ministry. And uneducated clergy lead to uneducated congregations. And uneducated congregations are easy prey for false teachers, cults and superstitions that have serious consequences. Stott’s words stuck with me and since then Nancy and I have been involved in building up the libraries of pastors and seminaries around the world. 

While I was a pastor at Greenfield, working on my doctorate we had a member of our congregation from the African country of Cameroon. He was in Canada attending Edmonton Baptist Seminary and working on a Master’s program. Johnson and I got to know each other well. I even supervised the internship he did at our church. His plan was to graduate and then go back to the Cameroon Baptist Seminary and teach and train pastors. Through our conversations Johnson would regularly encourage me to come and teach in Cameroon and so I made a deal with him that I would come and teach in Cameroon once I graduated with my doctorate. A few years later Johnson was teaching back in Cameroon and I contacted him. Shortly thereafter I was on a plane keeping my word. That was to be the first of four trips. Each time I go for a few weeks and teach a class of about 50 pastors and pastors in training. And every time I’m there I know that this is what I am supposed to be doing with my life.     

 To give you a taste of my trips, the following excerpts are reports back to my home church (Bethany), written during my fourth trip. I went with a team of twelve. I taught while the rest were involved in a variety of other projects around the seminary and surrounding hospitals.   

      

Bethany Baptist Cameroon Update 1 - Sunday, Jan. 5, 10:02pm (local time)

One hour to Seattle. Nine hours to France. Seven hours to Cameroon. Move the clocks ahead nine hours. Lose one night of sleep. Read approximately 350 pages. And we’ve arrived!!! That is, we’ve arrived in Cameroon. We still need to drive to our final destination.

I sat next to some interesting people on the flights. From Seattle to Paris I conversed with a lady who is a teacher at a boarding school in Germany for missionary kids. Then, on my way from Paris to Cameroon, I sat next a guy from Switzerland who has been living in Cameroon for two years as a community project developer with the government. One of the more hilarious moments on that flight was the stewardess’s French to English translation warning us that “those smoking in the toilet would be persecuted.”

After landing in Cameroon at 8pm on Saturday night (local time) we discovered that two of our bags were missing. After putting in our claim at the airport we left and were greeted by our missionaries Gord and Denise Erickson (they run a school for missionary kids in Cameroon) who brought us to their house for a light snack and much needed sleep.

On Saturday morning we started our seven hour trip to Bamenda where we met up with another one of our missionary couples, Cal and Susie Hohn. Cal is the field Director of the Cameroon Baptist Convention. There at the guest house we had supper and attended an orientation session. Tomorrow we make the final four hour jaunt to the seminary in Ndu. Once there we will begin our two weeks of service projects.

The team has been bonding, laughing, and enjoying the sights, sounds and smells of the Cameroonian culture during our road trip. Like Eric said, “I’ve seen lots of this stuff in documentaries, but it is totally different to actually be in it.”

Bethany Baptist Cameroon Update 2 - Tuesday, Jan. 7, 1:44pm (local time)

Five more hours of travel from Bamenda to Ndu and we finally arrived at our destination after four days and twenty-two hours of travel. This last stretch had some interesting road conditions where we had to exit the van and walk so that our driver could navigate the many holes. Other times we all leaned to one side of the van to assist our driver in keeping things upright. We got to listen to the bottom of the van scrape along the road as other Cameroonians had filled in the pot holes with rocks to help us along the way. The bumps, twists and turns did a number on us and Toby lost his lunch out the window a few times. Once we were even yelled at as Toby puked on an area of road a crew was working on. But we made it. That night, after supper, we met with the president and vice president of the seminary and were warmly greeted. 

Tuesday morning breakfast was at 7am followed by chapel at 7:30am. We enjoyed the singing, clapping and rhythm of the African drums. This was followed by a message and then an official team greeting. My class started at 8:30am with 53 students. The rest of the team got a tour of the seminary grounds. During lunch the team reported back and were astonished at the appalling and unsanitary conditions of the male dorms at the seminary, where up to five sleep in a room about the size of my church office. They also had an eye opener visiting a health center nearby where nothing is sterilized and they only have a doctor on site once a week.

This afternoon everybody is beginning to learn about their areas of assistance with the library, computers, construction and hospital. Horst is dealing with a number of stomach problems today and is taking it easy, but Toby is back on his feet. Our two missing bags have been found and will be sent to us on Thursday.

Bethany Baptist Cameroon Update 3 - Friday, Jan. 10, 1:08pm (local time)

Our team just finished lunch and while eating, supper was slaughtered before us. I couldn’t watch the poor chicken get her head severed from her body, but Toby and Terry videoed the whole affair. This after Toby was petting the chicken and named her Emilie. Hopefully Emilie will taste good tonight. I’ve heard we’re having her in tomato sauce.

My class has been going well, but there is a great variance in the students’ abilities. 17 people failed their first assignment, 13 people excelled, and the other half of the class were somewhere in the middle. A few of my students challenged our missions team to a volleyball game on Saturday morning at 8am and we accepted.  

Bethany Baptist Cameroon Update #4 - Sunday, Jan. 12, 1:31pm (local time)

We went to church today to experience a typical African Baptist worship service, which is usually three hours long. (Longer when they have guests or do communion). If you want something shorter you will have to go to a Catholic service that follows the liturgy and is usually only an hour.

As people come to church they start by filling up the first bench (and that is all they are, wooden benches with no backs) and then the next one, front to back. Everyone sits packed together. Much of the service went back and forth between English and Pigeon English which was then translated into the people’s local language. There were about 600 adults in attendance and another 400 children that met in a separate building. About an hour into the service they greeted us by calling us on stage. I brought greetings from Canada and shared a short encouragement from Romans 12:9-12.

The announcements were definitely a community event. Everything from the upcoming Sunday school classes, vaccinations at the health center and “talk to the pastor after the service if you are interested in joining the Cameroonian army” were given.

The service consisted of a lot of singing and dancing. Little children in the back spun to the music and grandpas bobbed up and down as they danced to the front and put their offering into a baskets on the stage. Not everyone had money and so others brought garden produce or animals to be auctioned off to the highest bidder later in the service. All the money collected became part of the Sunday morning offering. Carrots, peas, beans, yams, potatoes and a live chicken were auctioned. The chicken was snatched up for the equivalent of eight Canadian dollars. The total Sunday morning offering (including the money from the auction) came to about sixty dollars Canadian. When I watched the people go forward and give their few pennies, I couldn’t help but think of what Jesus said to his disciples as they watched the crowds drop their offerings at the Temple.

“I tell you that this poor widow put in more than all the others. For the others offered their gifts from what they had to spare of their riches; but she, poor as she is, gave all she had to live on.”  (Luke 21:3-4, GNB).

This story always fascinates me because the widow had two pennies. Even if she would have dropped in one she would have given a 50% tithe. Instead, she gave everything she had.

Bethany Baptist Cameroon Update 5 - Wednesday, Jan. 15, 2:38pm (local time)

53 students, 6 assignments, 3 pages per assignment = 954 pages of reading and marking. That has been most of my life in the afternoons. The next couple of days I will be marking my students on their in-class mini-sermons. The rest of the team has been able to get more sun by working outside with the construction or the elementary school kids. I preached in the morning chapel on Monday and Tuesday. 

Anyone who thinks that following Jesus amounts to the same as following any other religious belief should sit through my preaching classes and listen to my student’s stories. A common theme is dealing with issues of demon possession, witch doctors and sorcery. In fact, during one of these discussions we saw some Ju Jus dancing in the street just outside of the seminary compound. The Ju Jus are witchdoctors who work themselves into a possessed frenzy and then dance and twitch while waving their spears in traditional African garb. Most people are afraid of them and you are supposed to bow down to them when they pass by. Most do, but a few of my students told me stories of how they refused to bow to the Ju Jus while the Ju Jus were poking them in the chest with their spears. Sometimes the Ju Jus will even try and disrupt a Christian worship service. There is also the Night Ju Ju who put a curse on anyone they see at night. Many people live in fear of evil spirits and have seen things that we in North America simply try to explain away. The pastors in my class are trying to teach their people not to go to the witchdoctors when they get sick, not to bow to the Ju Ju, and to refuse to wear the magic charms and amulets that are supposed to protect you, but only keep you in bondage to fear. Could you imagine if all the Christians threw away their charms and refused to go to the witchdoctor? What would happen to the Ju Jus if the crowds simply laughed at them rather than bowed to them?  It reminds me of what the people of Ephesus feared from Paul’s preaching. (Acts 19:23-27).            

Bethany Baptist Cameroon Update 6 - Sunday, Jan. 19, 10:29pm (local time)

We are taking today to rest at the Baptist Guest House in Bamenda. Yesterday we packed the bus and left Ndu. A number of the kids we have gotten to know came to see us off and give us notes and drawings they had personally made. Many hugs and tears were shed. I completed all of my grading and handed it in to the president before I left. The final marks of my students ranged from a 47% to a 94%. The time was enjoyable, but after 40 hours of teaching and 1000 pages of marking I’m pretty exhausted. Toby did better on our trip back to Bamenda thanks to Gravol. The team met this morning to have our own little church service. Tonight we will debrief. Tomorrow we’re off to Yaounde where we will spend a bit of time with Gord and Denise Erickson (and hopefully have a chance to shower) before we head to the airport to catch our 11:55pm flight. Three flights later we will be back in Vancouver on Tuesday at 4:18pm.

Question: How has serving on a mission’s trip impacted you?